At The Beginning - (Free Assoc Group 2018.03.17 - BEGINNING)

At the very start
I drew in a breath
then I let it out
and repeated the process

Later on I began to mimic
I said little words
that meant big things
to other people

Then I read
I read those words
and so many more
My world began to form

I began to fear
a little later on
things around me
that hurt me inside

I then decided to
be my own person
I didn't care anymore
What the others thought

I threw caution to the wind
I became an adult
I was irresponsible
And I enjoyed every moment

Then I started to care
where I was going
what I was doing
who I was becoming

I began to make a plan
projected forward in time
thought about my future
became like the others

And now just recently
I began to remember
all of the dreams
that I had set aside

I started to realize
it is all up to me
I am taking my future
into my own hands

PATTERNS - Free Assoc Group 2018.03.03

They are everywhere, you know
You may think it's all random
But within that randomness
the free-form
the here and there
the herky-jerky
You can spot them if you
look with intent

They are passive
They are active
Do you count your steps?
Do you cluster items in threes?
Do you face all your coffee mug
handles in one direction?

That's a part of it
We are all a part of it.
Cracks in sidewalks
Doors and windows
Breathing and counting

Those daily walks
I always start by taking a right
Routes we take
to work
the store
the park

Call them habits
That's easy enough
Call them habits
that you hold yourself to
Call them habits
you must take
before you make another move

It's all there
Laid out for us to see
To notice if you care to
To ignore if you can
To deny if you have that inclination
Even that
That is part of your pattern

Which makes you more comfortable?
Is it symmetry you seek?
does that calm your mind
Is it a fractal pattern you need?
do you desire the journey
growing and changing
yet always ending the same
although never really ending
it never really ends

You have a childlike urge to find
a fiddle-head fern
a fossil of an ancient seashell
round and round
geometry and numbers
angles and equations
but nature
always nature
providing the most beautiful
patterns of all

The Secret at the Bottom - not entirely sure of the title yet

That endless abyss
it calls my name
it screams and shouts
it purrs and whispers in my ear
"Come closer, this is the answer"
And so I think
this may be true
"You may be my answer"
and I step to the edge
sure-footed
because I am not afraid
and down I look
deep
deeper
And I think I spy
with my curious eye
Something
Is that the bottom?
It may or may not be
but there is
something
down deep
in that abyss
It glimmers and winks
Like a shimmering breeze
The aurora borealis perhaps
A flake of diamond airborne
Snow during sunset
Set alight - fire against ice
I peer closer
intent on
discovery of the truth
I am being pulled in
Alice down the rabbit-hole
I am being pulled down
Deep desperate breaths
What is it?
I know I see it
I know it is there
Torn between leaning
past that point of balance
where there is no turning back
accepting the force
the force of gravity
giving in and letting go
or walking on
continuing along the path
through
light and dark
unknowing
but trusting my instinct
and watching it all unfold
before me
behind me
around me
I strain my curious eye again
a lens coming into focus
I then comprehend
"This surely is my answer"
and I straighten my spine
and bend my neck back
and see that it was merely
the reflection
of the sky
all along